10:56 a.m…. knock knock…room service – isn’t that the sweetest thing?… the breakfast was yummy, and Marysia said she hadn’t had hers yet (at 11a.m.!!) because she’d been making mine all morning…awwww….how lovely – maybe even sweeter than her mango-strawberry-watermelon salad- yum.
I don’t celebrate mother’s day usually – just awkward to celebrate your own holiday. Usually I spend my day in my garden, contemplating herbal aromas and beautiful flowers yet to be planted, cook something simple or go out to early dinner. But this year is different, it really feels like I deserve a day off – after 2 weekends of sleepless, kid’s-stomach-ache-filled, nights, I find myself succumb to a not-a-kind-of mom-I-strive-to-be – a sensation I’m not too proud of :(. So I let myself reflect a little on my “behavior”, and other stuff, too, and it feels like mother’s day is a perfect opportunity to do just that.
But for those of you who want this blog post to be about my “new years resolutions on how to be a better mom/person” – you don’t have to read any further since my musings are mostly photographic in nature this year. I spent a lot of time recently on a personal project, photographic one, too ( stay tuned – soon will write about that one) and was lucky enough to have found several pictures of my mom, some of them with little me!! Such a rush of memories and feelings and…… regret of having only a handful…There is no redo on all those years that we are not in the pictures with the rest of our family…unfortunately. I know those endless excuses of bad-hair-days, sleepless nights, pounds to shed etc. before we even let ourselves in front of a camera but I also know this – it all doesn’t matter because for our kids we are still the most beautiful moms, make-up or no. I know because my mom, on those several rediscovered pictures, is just that – the most beautiful mom in the world. I ‘m so happy to have those memories preserved. I miss you, Mom…
And I have some ideas how to turn us – invisible moms – into award nominated best or best supporting ones at least. I’ll keep you posted. Malina
my Mom and I, Baltic Sea circa ’77
photo by my father